Forgiveness and Light by Christina Sinisi ~ Truth in Fiction Blog

For those of you who don’t know me (probably most of Jenni’s readers—nice to meet you), I’m a psychology professor as well as a writer of Christian romance. This week, in my Positive Psychology class, I lectured about forgiveness.

Coincidentally, forgiveness is one of the main themes of my Christmas novella, The Christmas Confusion, published last year.  In that story, both main characters must forgive each other for mistakes they made years earlier before they can move on in the present.

In my lecture, I cited research by McCullough and colleagues, among others, which shows that increased forgiveness lowers a desire for revenge and increases positive action. The earliest research in the area, conducted by Emerson in 1964, found that there is a forgiveness of the self, forgiveness of others, and a forgiveness of God. If you’re as startled as I am by that last one—first, who knew psychologists were allowing for a study of God’s impact in our lives and second, who are we to presume to forgive God—you’re not alone. Most of my students flinch at the idea of forgiving God until they realize how often we get angry with the Lord. Something terrible happens in our lives. We ask for something very important to us and there seemingly is no answer, or the answer is no.

But God is a big God. Have you read the book of Job? Job complained and fussed at God. Did God smite him? No, God answered him. Mind you, it was a bit of a smack down, but God understands that we hurt and cry out and He loves us any way.

The research goes on to report that forgiveness of any kind gifts us with benefits—lower depression, anxiety, anger, and heart disease. Worthington states that forgiveness is an “altruistic gift to the self.” It brings gratitude (sometimes–let’s not pretend that there aren’t people out there who don’t see their faults and will react badly to your offer of forgiveness—be careful out there) in the forgiven and release in the forgiver.

So, if you carry the burden—no matter how big or small—start on the path of forgiveness. Say it out loud. Take steps—write a letter and rip it up, imagine yourself forgiving the person—and give yourself time. If you need help, google Everett Worthington and find one of his Forgiveness therapy programs near you.

But do seek forgiveness and give it as much as you are able. A burden will be lifted and relationships can be repaired. Including our most important one, that of our relationship with God.

Matthew 11:25-30 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble of heart; and you will find rest. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.”

 

 

When Tiffany Marano’s high school sweetheart drove off to join the Marines and never looked back, she swore off men. Now, she’s content to teach at Summer Creek, South Carolina’s local elementary school, lead a Sunday school class, and spend weekends with her niece—until Nick Walsh suddenly reappears wearing a wedding ring and with a daughter in tow. Everything about Tiffany’s calm, quiet life is now one disordered mess. Nick Walsh comes face to face with Tiffany after all these years, and sparks fly. But not the happy glittering kind, because each of them thinks the other responsible for their estrangement. Before they can work it out, though, Tiffany’s sister disappears. Left with custody of her niece and forced to work with new police detective Nick to find her sister, old feelings begin to resurface. As they start to unravel the truths that left them confused and apart for too long, Nick must learn to let go of his past. But can Tiffany let go of her fear and learn to trust that God isn’t the only one who won’t abandon her? 

Buy the book on Amazon.

 

 

A member of American Christian Fiction Writers, Christina Sinisi writes stories about families, both the broken and blessed. Her works include a semi-finalist in the Amazon Breakthrough Novel Award contest and the American Title IV Contest where she appeared in the top ten in the Romantic Times magazine. Her published books include The Christmas Confusion and the upcoming Sweet Summer, the first two books in the Summer Creek Series, as well as Christmas on Ocracoke, expected November 2020. By day, she is a psychology professor and lives in the LowCountry of South Carolina with her husband and two children and loves a good cooking challenge.

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